Disappointment, grief, loss…where are you God?

Words to a friend after great disappointment in a risk she took to get answers she longed for…

My son reminded me of a statement as I read a piece he wrote: “the quality and outcomes of your life will be determined in part by the risks you are willing to make.”
You took a huge risk and followed the Lord into a situation. You have done well. I continue to learn many things about the Lord in recent years and even days. One is that I must step out in faith and be okay with whatever outcome the Lord may bring. He is sovereign – He is in control – He loves me – He is all-powerful – He does not change – He is the same in every struggle and on the other side of every struggle. I used to think that if I was really living the Christian life, that struggle and doubt would be eliminated at some point, but I am beginning to see that struggle and doubt and suffering are part of the journey. If God eliminated those, we wouldn’t need Him! As my son also says, “life is more about learning to struggle, doubt, and suffer well.” I believe your heart can grieve the outcome of your efforts and should grieve. But keep going – keep searching for all God has for you. Don’t give up – know Him better through this suffering. He longs for you to know Him!

We all search for answers to questions we have in life; that is a real part of life. Sometimes we are glad when the answer comes and sometimes we don’t get the answer we had hoped for. In fact, the latter is most commonly true. The answer you have found is just an answer, but it is not THE ANSWER – it is not where your hope is. Our hope cannot be in the ANSWER to a question – it really is in Christ. When we get those disappointing answers, we can give up on asking the questions or keep pressing on. The point is to keep walking, even in the greatest disappointment or crisis of belief. God always walks with us and takes us to the next step. Many things will not be understood or figured out this side of heaven. The chapter 11 of Hebrews men and women of faith never saw the fulfillment of their faith on earth but they were being highlighted for their faith. I would say that you are a woman of faith!!.

Risk is a great part of our lives – it is part of what faith is all about. And in the days ahead, do not be afraid to risk again. God is faithful. He is continuing to show you Himself – finding Him in the midst of your questions is often greater than finding Him in the midst of the answer you wanted. I think it is probably always greater!

I hope I make a little sense – I am proud of you. Keep stepping out – trusting God – learning as you walk. I know the questions you have are ones that have caused you great sorrow and pain…and this adds to it, but God is there – He is with you – He doesn’t leave you. He is teaching you. He is leading you. Our biblical worldview is different from all others in that it offers a God who suffers with you and grieves with you – He grieves not only with you but over the choices some have made that have caused you such sorrow.

-Who knows the reasons behind the answer you have received? An all-knowing God does! HE knows the parts to this story we cannot see and He knows how it will all come together one day. The answer to our questions is rarely about “us.” We are a part of a Kingdom of God and we must be willing to be used to make a difference in the Kingdom in others’ lives.

-Think of the life lesson and what you can tell your children in the days ahead when they struggle and have questions…”I once did something that was very hard in search of an answer, took a great risk – and did not get the answer I longed for. But God was faithful to me and He will be faithful to you.” There will be many times when you and those around you need those words of affirmation.

I believe you followed the Lord – the answer was not what you longed for it to be, but it doesn’t mean the situation was wrong and that you did the wrong thing. Remember that life is not about ridding yourself of struggle, pain, doubt, and suffering – it is that in this fallen world, we have a Savior and with Him, we can struggle, doubt, and suffer well!! He will not leave you or forsake you.

I love you my friend and am in the journey of life with you!!


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